Why You're Probably Doing AI All Wrong

Rise and shine, contrarians! Let's turn this Monday into a masterpiece. (Or at least make it slightly less Monday-ish.)

It's time for another edition of the Contrarian Marketer, where we challenge conventional wisdom and uncover fresh insights. You get one insightful article with key insights, one Fun Thing, and one Feature of the Week (so keep scrolling).

If you missed last week's article, Why Most Webinars Suck, I shared most webinars suck (surprise) and a tactical checklist to make your webinar suck less. Also, check out this bonus article from last week called OnlyFans’ $31M-per-employee Secret.

Today we’re talking about how to integrate large language models (generative AI) into your MarTech stack.

Let me guess: your LinkedIn feed is flooded with marketers humble-bragging about their "AI-powered" everything. 

While everyone's hoarding AI tools like they're limited-edition Pokemon cards, I'm here to tell you why you might want to pump those brakes. 

It isn't about how many tools you can stack into your marketing toolkit—it's in finding the few that actually move the needle.

The Truth About AI That Nobody's Talking About

AI in marketing isn't about robots taking your job (though they might take Dave from accounting's job—sorry, Dave). 

It's about eliminating those mind-numbing tasks that make you question your life choices at 3 PM on a Wednesday.

Think of AI as your marketing department's overachieving intern: it crunches numbers faster than your Excel can crash, spots patterns that humans miss, and never asks for a recommendation letter.

This means less time wrestling with spreadsheets and more time doing what you actually enjoy—like creating campaigns that make people throw money at your products.

Where AI Actually Makes a Difference (And Where It's Just Showing Off)

1. Data Processing That Won't Make Your Brain Hurt

Remember staring at customer data until your eyes crossed, trying to figure out why sales tanked in certain regions? 

For example, Albert AI (not sponsored) can do that heavy lifting while you do something more productive—like actually talking to customers. This autonomous platform doesn't just analyze your data—it actually makes campaign decisions in real-time across channels.

Here's what this could look like in practice: Imagine you're running a kitchenware brand. 

You're pushing ads everywhere but can't nail down why some products fly off the shelves while others collect dust. 

Albert spots a pattern you never would have: your premium knife sets get the most engagement between 1 AM and 4 AM from users browsing professional culinary content. 

Plot twist: you've been missing the professional chef market because you were too focused on home cooks. Sometimes your best customers shop while the rest of us are sleeping. Who knew?

2. Content Creation That Doesn't Sound Like It Was Written by Your Robot Vacuum

If you're drowning in SKUs with slight variations in colors, finishes, and features, you have two options:

➡️ Check out my detailed Guide to AI-Powered Product Descriptions for a step-by-step system (complete with prompts and templates) or take the DIY route. T

The quick version? 

Create a spreadsheet that breaks down your products by SKU, mapping out every color, material, and size variation. 

Then feed this structured data into a large language database model like ChatGPT, Claude, etc. with a prompt that tells it to highlight specific attributes while maintaining your brand voice. 

3. Customer Acquisition That Isn't Just Spraying and Praying

Here's where it gets interesting: instead of blasting the same message to everyone who's ever breathed near your website, AI can help you find the customers who actually want your stuff. 

By analyzing purchase patterns, browsing behavior, and engagement data, predictive AI can identify your most profitable customer segments and when they're most likely to buy. 

Want to know if your premium customers shop late at night? Or if early morning browsers spend more on bundles? 

Feed your customer data into an AI model and let it uncover patterns your human brain might miss. A good AI system will not just tell you who might buy—it'll tell you when to reach them and what to offer them.

4. Sales Support That Actually Supports Sales

AI's real power lies in understanding the subtle patterns in how customers shop and buy. Instead of relying on gut feelings or last year's numbers, AI can analyze customer behavior to identify which products naturally sell together, when customers are most likely to make additional purchases, and what price points trigger buying decisions. 

This means smarter product recommendations, better-timed promotions, and more strategic bundling. 

Want to boost your average order value? Feed your historical sales data into an AI model to spot purchase patterns—like which customers consistently buy certain versions, or which entry-level products lead to higher-value purchases down the line. 

When you let data guide your sales strategy, you're not just hoping for bigger orders—you're strategically matching customers with products they're actually likely to want.

How to Get Started Without Looking Like You're Just Jumping on the Bandwagon

Here's your no-nonsense guide to actually useful AI:

1. Start with Your Biggest Headache

Pick the task that makes you want to throw your laptop out the window. That's your starting point.

2. Test It Like You Mean It

Most AI tools offer free trials. Use them. Give one tool two weeks of your attention (yes, actual attention, not just signing up and forgetting about it).

3. Track What Actually Matters

"Because everyone else is doing it" isn't a metric. Track time saved, sales increased, and headaches avoided.

4. Train Your Humans

The best AI is useless if your team treats it like your parents treat their smartphone—with fear and suspicious poking.

AI in marketing isn't about replacing human creativity or judgment—it's about giving humans their humanity back. Start small, focus on actual problems (not theoretical ones), and for heaven's sake, don't try to AI-ify everything at once.

Try one AI tool this quarter. Just one. Make it count. Because the goal isn't to impress your LinkedIn network with how many AI tools you've implemented—it's to sell more products while maintaining your sanity.

Until next time, keep swimming against the current! 

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